Saturday, July 22, 2006
GM's remark
I am please to inform you that have been selected for the Mayor's Internship Programme with Central Singapore CDC withh effect from 2 May to 21 July.
It was a fairly interview process. i still remember hanging out in a chalet the previous night with my smu classmates, playing game, trying to down all the hard liquor that we have brought. because of the interview, i left at 3am (interviews at 10:00am... not bad huh?). i still remember the questions which were asked. what do you know about CDC, my answer: i don't know, what is it? do you think its grassroots work? my answer: yes. just that its more macro. (i think this is the only part which i even come close to a right answer). basically, i think i had flunked all my answer that jasmine and elfian posed to me until kelvin stepped in, fashionably late and ask me one question. tell me what do you know about general election 2006. and here's comes the impressive part. i have lived in an area where opposition sentiments has always been way above national average. my father though uneducated, has politics running in his blood and in some ways, he has passed some to me. in all my impromptu speeches since sec school, my pet topic is politics be in in singapore or malaysia or even germany and i have always gotten away with an A. and there i go, blabbering all my rubbish. b4 kelvin concluded, i think you have got what it takes and i am willing take a shot at you.
20 July.... in kelvin's office:
Kelvin: I have never regret taking any interns in. For some, its because they can contribute, for the rest, it is because they have the potential to contribute alot more later in life, and i want them to be put through this learning journey to help them attain their potential. You're a bright chap, i know that, the reason why i have taken you on is because i find you're a deep thinker but because of your negativity, you never showed your true capabilities. its surprising how after you have been through so much, you are not cynical. i can tell you are a responsible person, but you write things off too easily. maybe its because you're smart or because... i dunno, you just spread negativity too easily. we have to be professional in many things we do. we don't always get our way. you have to come to term with that and grapple with that, knowing what is to be done, and what is the right way it should be done. whatever you have done in this internship, take it as a learning experience be it packing goodie bags, or some menial chores, there always something to reflect with regards to the facts of life.
that sums it, my GM summary of my stint in CDC. nothing good, in fact, i have only provided a summary of what is said because that is all that i have picked out. firstly, he feel that i hadn't meet up to his expectiation. maybe he is right, i am inexperienced, i don't know the system well enough. but at least i said i have tried. i came, i fought, and whatever outcome, at least i've tried. i've tried to instill change into a rigid system that has brought singapore to its current state in the past 40 years, but is clearly incapable of doing it for another 40 years. no doubt, i maybe negative, but i quote him in another of his speech. "i won't be doing my best, if i am not prepared to leave it any moment". that is the mentality i have developed soon after i enter this place. who wouldn't want to leave with a good testimonial for a resume that will almost certainly kickstart a career. but between having a good testimonial and the so many things in the internship which i can do, i choose all the others. i chose the fellow interns, even though staying in touch is one of the hardest thing to do. but i want to think that all of us are like minded, and i won't let the chance to know such like minded people pass me by. i chose an identity, following instruction blindly with apathy and resigning yourself to fate. is this what is taught in school? NO! i was taught to do the right thing. i am not an evil person who is out to harm anyone and i know it. i have the confident in my own values, my own principle that i know if i stick by it, i will be in a position to help people. if there is anything which i had truly did wrong, it is i didn't express myself well. but no, apathy to me is a crime which i will not commit. idealistic? perhaps. but i guess at this age, i should give it a fight. i came into this place, with the apathy mindset, but within just 2 weeks of knowing the jc interns, i was reminded what i was like in sec school. i was a dreamer, with so much to fufill. no doubt, back then, i was already labelled "enigmatic" but it is through those behaviours i have made some of my best friends in life. a set back in sec 4 kill alot of that ideal off and brought me down to earth. but the jc interns reminded me that dream can still come true, so long as you preservere. and honeslty, i have never looked back. if there is one thing i had take away, its the meaning of pay if forward. as long as if presevere in my belief, i will eventually be able to spread my ideals to others who will in turn spread to more and in time, there will be enough people who are likeminded.
posted @ 3:14 PM ||
